HE's Still Working on Me!!!

Do you remember that song we used to sing as children?  It went:
"He's still working on me;
to make me what I ought to be;
it took him just a week to make the moon and the stars, the sun and the earth and jupiter and mars;
how loving and patient he must be 'cause  He's still working on me."

I sang that song so much as a kid, in VBS, and Sunday School that I probably could have sung it in my sleep.  I even believed it, but I never KNEW IT.  I can honestly say now that I know it!  God has been working on me.  My life, my attitude, the way I deal with everyone around me, but especially my prayer life.   

I always get up very early in the morning and start my day with Bible reading and prayer.  I don't say this with pride because I know that the only reason I  do it is because I am so incredibly desperate for God that I can't not do it.  And the only reason I am desperate for God is because he has put a desire for him into my heart.  There is nothing good in me that would make me seek God, but he sought me!

For the last several months, when I would study the Word and pray, I would often feel that I was not connecting with God.  It was terrible!  I felt so cut off from God and I didn't know what to do to get back to him.  So many things were going wrong and I couldn't do a thing to fix them.  For a control freak like me this is really, really bad.  I felt myself starting to get angry with God, but I knew that was just dumb.  How can I dare to be angry with God when he's God???  So, along I go trying to get back to God, trying to pretend I'm not angry with him, and guess what?  It's not working.  It's so crazy to deny the feelings I was having toward God when he knows my heart inside and out.

Truth be told, I was mad at God.  In my head, I knew without a doubt that God is in control and that what he does is good.  In my heart, I was questioning why he doesn't do things differently (read:  my way).  I know when I have all the answers, I will see that God's ways were and are best.  So, instead of continuing to be angry at God, which is foolishness, I repented of my sin because surely this was sin.  I had started believing the lies of the enemy.  I began to think that I did not matter to God because he didn't do what I asked him to.  I became so "me" centered that I  made myself spritually sick.

Repentance is such a beautiful word.  I feel as if I have been born again, again.  God doesn't answer to me, and boy am thankful for that!  Left to me, I would screw this world up so bad.  Since God has always been God, I think I will just stop trying to "help" him be God.

So, through this convoluted post, probably full of run-on sentences and fragmented thoughts, I hope to tell you that God is still on his throne.  He always was.  I just got lost and didn't look to him for deliverance.  But, thankfully, He's still working on me!!!

Posting Difficulties

Posting has been difficult lately.  My laptop is fine, but the power cord that makes it work has bit the dust.  In the little town I live in, buying a cord for an Apple computer is like trying to buy caviar.  Not easy!  So, I ordered one and in the meantime I have been forced to use the family computer.  It's nice.  It has a big screen.  It works well.  But......the chair isn't as comfortable as "my" chair where I use my laptop.  This has caused me to neglect posting. I know I'm spoiled.  


According to my tracking information, my power cord will come tomorrow and within a few hours, my red battery will turn green.  I have some pictures from last weekend and some others from our Saint Patrick's Day dinner, but I cannot upload them to a dead computer.  I can't wait to show everyone the green frosting we made.  Not  a drop of food coloring, but the prettiest shade of green!  I'll tell you how we did it when I can post a picture.

Simply Simplifying

I am kind of a strange person.  Those of you who know me know this to be true!  I love shopping although I don't always buy something.  Most of my shopping these days is grocery shopping.  But, I even enjoy grocery shopping.  Katie and I try to make a game out of how much we can save by using coupons and shopping the sales.  Sometimes it feels like a game of strategy.  


One of my "strangest" qualities is that I really like to throw things away.  I go through periods of time where I purge everything.  I am definitely not a pack rat. I used to be, but as time goes on I am finding that there is a lot of pleasure in simplifying.  Usually around the season change (although we don't get much of that!) I get the itch to grab some trash bags and start sifting through our things.  I use the three box/bag method.  One bag is for garbage.  This is the stuff that nobody would want.  Things that are broken and torn in a way that cannot be fixed would go in this category.  The next bag is for give-a-ways.  This is the stuff that we would give to someone else.  This would consist of clothes that don't fit anymore or maybe kitchen appliances that are never used and are just taking up space.  If you look through all your cabinets and closets you will be surprised at how much stuff is just sitting around.  The last bag is for stuff you are undecided about.  If you have an item of clothing that you are not sure you want to part with, put it in this bag.  If after a month or two you find that you haven't missed the stuff in bag number three, give it away.  Somebody else can probably use it.  Don't give away stuff that should go in your garbage bag.  


You won't believe the freedom you will feel when you untangle yourself from your stuff!  Sometimes we don't realize how much we are loving the things of this world until it's time to let some of it go.  Give it a try.  Simplify a few things and see how you feel.  Try just one room to start with.  Maybe without all our material possessions suffocating us, we can breathe again.